Family Story~Armenia

First, please give a brief overview of your family:  how many children, how old they are etc.

Jim and I have been married for 13 years and have 3 biological children and 1 blessing through adoption.  Madeline (11), Marney (9), Owen (6), and Ben (2), already, we forget which one was adopted.

1. What led you to adoption?

Adoption was never on our radar screen as a young married couple.  We easily conceived 3 children with no fertility issues.  We probably never would have thought much about adoption if it had not been for my sister and brother-in-law.  They brought home our first nephew home from Russia 9 years ago, and since then have taught us much about the beauty and challenges of adoption.  As their family grew, we would often look at our nieces and nephews, and wonder what their lives would be like had they never joined our family.  It was painful to consider that they may never have had a family to call their own.  

“Once our eyes are opened, we can’t pretend we don’t know what to do.  God, who weighs our hearts and knows our souls, knows that we know, and holds us responsible to act.”

I have, for reasons I can’t explain, always felt that I was going to be the Mother of a child with Down syndrome.  Throughout my three pregnancy’s, I felt at peace with the possibility it could happen, in fact I was practically convinced it would.   I didn’t have most of the diagnostic testing that I could have, because it simply didn’t matter what kind of child God decided to give us. 

God had other plans, he decided to give us 3 wonderful “typical” children.  Funny guy.  We felt so lucky and happy to have those three healthy, smart, and beautiful kids.   We are truly blessed, and so not worthy.  They bring so much joy to our lives. 

Even though life was busy and fulfilling, we never lost our heart for children with special needs. When God opened our eyes and our hearts to adoption, it seemed only natural to hope that he would match us with a child with Down syndrome.  It was an “ah ha” moment.  This was why he had planted that feeling in our hearts so many years ago, he wanted us to step out in a way we could never have imagined.

And thus began our adoption adventure…

2. What was most helpful in the beginning of your journey?

Having a sister and brother-in-law who are so knowledgeable about adoption, and such a source of encouragement was priceless.

3.  What were/are your favorite adoption resources?

Dr. Ray Guarendi’s book “Adoption, Choosing it, Living it, and Loving it”  It is a funny and common sense look at adoption, an easy informative read.

4.  How did you fund your adoption?

Whatever it took, short of begging.   However, we are not proud people, and would have resorted to begging if need be!

We traded in a car for something less expensive, and Jim took a second job delivering pizza’s for a little while.  Also, we held a garage sale.  Generous friends and neighbors donated items to help us raise money.  I worked part time while going to school, and homeschooling our children.  We trimmed our budget where ever we could.  We also received some generous donations from family and strangers alike.  It was a crazy time, but we basically decided we needed to do whatever we had to, to bring our little guy home.

5.  Why did you choose International/Domestic/Foster?

We originally started out thinking we would adopt domestically, but God kept closing that door.  It was not until we found Ben on a waiting child list that things began to happen, so we felt that this was the direction we were supposed to go.

6.  Anything you would say to encourage those still on the fence?

Go for it!

7.  Any adjustments/challenges with your child/children

We are currently in Armenia completing our adoption, so we have only had Ben for about 2 weeks.  So far the adjustment has been very smooth.  He is a happy, easy going little guy.  He has a few issues we are working on, but overall we could not be more thrilled with how quickly we have bonded.

8.  What was your biggest fear?

My secret biggest fear was that I would never be able to love Ben like I love the children I gave birth to.  That fear was put to rest the moment I held Ben in my arms for the first time.  There was an instant, unexplainable connection.  

9.  What has been your greatest blessing?

So far, our greatest blessing has been finally getting our hands on this boy!  He is such a joy.  We cannot wait to get him home, and introduce him to the rest of our family.

Thanks for sharing your story!